They say that I’m shy and polite; that my smile is always bright.
They say that I’m calm and collected; not an ounce of an ill temper ever detected.
But they can’t see my heart, they can’t hear my thoughts.
They can’t reach down in the pit of my soul and dredge up all of my secrets,
my fantasies, and my dreams.
They can’t see my fears.
I may be conservative and polite, I may be calm and I may be bright,
but what they see on the outside is not what they’ll find on the inside.
No.
I am not, nor will I ever be
who they say I am.
Because I am beautiful,
I am black, and I am proud.
I am weak and I am strong.
I am happy, yet I’m sad
I am like you,
I am unique, I am special,
Only I am not you.
I am me.
I am JENAYA,
And there is no other.
So judge me not by my appearance.
Judge me not by the clothes I wear.
Judge me not by the things I do, by the way I walk, by the way I talk...
In fact, don’t judge me at all.
For who are you to call yourself God and look down on me?
Like I said, I am what I am
And that is all I will ever be.

Jenaya Joseph
February 21, 2005